Lacuna

The stench of my decomposing heart 

Permeates my being, polluting my soul with 

Unwanted memories 

War flashbacks from life lived in delusions 

Of a grand love, the varicose veins of a long dead 

heart injected with your damned lies

Each breath whip-lashing against the 

hollowness that has settled in my chest 

I ruffle frantically every morning

Through my kitchen cabinet, looking for 

A Knife with the broken handle that can cut through 

my skin, its Poisonous steel entering my veins, 

Draining me of blood, clogging my heart with rust

Clearing out ancient betrayals – both yours and mine-

weaving maps out of scars,  tracing incomprehensible words 

You, who used to tear off your silk dupattas

To tie them in my name,

At the shrines of unknown saints 

Now turn away from me 

Even in my dreams,

While maggots feed on my memory of you, 

One kiss at a time, till nothing is left, 

But an empty grave 

Rotting in the cloistered heart of 

My being 




--

TZ